When a cry for help becomes a battlefield, how we show up matters more than ever.

We’ve all felt it. That gnawing gap between being a great coach and running a thriving coaching business. You’ve mastered the competencies, the frameworks, the presence, but then you’re left wondering: How do I find my niche? How do I price my services? How do I stay visible without burning out?

Recently, I witnessed a powerful exchange in a coaching forum that laid bare this very tension and revealed deeper lessons about how we, as a community, respond to vulnerability.

A seasoned professional, freshly transitioned into full-time coaching, shared a heartfelt post. She named the unsaid truth: most training programs teach us how to coach, but not how to run a business. She listed the very real, very human struggles she’d heard from peers: the niche confusion, pricing paralysis, operational overwhelm, and the loneliness of entrepreneurship. Then, she asked a simple question: “What’s your #1 struggle right now?”

The post resonated. It was raw, relatable, and opened a space for peers to connect. The comments unfolded like a case study in human dynamics.

Some quickly hijacked the thread to promote their own events – a masterclass here, a certification prep there, blatantly redirecting the conversation to their own agendas. Then came the more subtle pivot: a critic dismissed the post as a “sales funnel” and recommended another expert’s work, who promptly appeared to agree and position her own “accredited” solution.

What started as a cry for community became a quiet battleground for attention.

𝗧𝗵𝗲 𝗧𝗵𝗿𝗲𝗲 𝗟𝗮𝘆𝗲𝗿𝘀 𝗼𝗳 𝗧𝗵𝗶𝘀 𝗦𝘁𝗼𝗿𝘆

1. The Authentic Ask

The original poster did something brave: she named a systemic gap and created a peer-led space to address it. This is where true community begins, not with answers, but with honest questions. Her approach was human-first, and that’s why it resonated.

2. The Hijack & The Redirect

The promotional comments and the critical redirect represent two sides of the same coin: scarcity mindset. In a field built on trust and relationships, these moves can feel predatory even if strategically clever. They communicate: “Your struggle is my opportunity.”

3. The Unspoken Cost

When we use someone’s vulnerable post as a platform for our own promotion, we trade short-term visibility for long-term trust. We also miss the chance to truly serve. The coaching community is small; how you show up today echoes in your reputation tomorrow.

Navigating with Integrity: A Path Forward

As a business coach, ICF PCC, and someone trained in both digital marketing and counselling, I see this through multiple lenses. Here’s what I offer to coaches navigating these waters:

If you’re struggling to build your practice:

• Seek peers, not just gurus. Peer circles are invaluable for shared wisdom and reducing isolation.

• When evaluating help, look for those who practice what they preach, especially in how they treat others. Integrity in action is the best marketing.

• Your niche isn’t just a market gap; it’s where your experience, passion, and compassion intersect. Start there.

If you’re offering solutions:

• Add value, don’t extract it. If you comment on a vulnerable post, offer genuine insight or empathy before ever mentioning your work.

• Elevate, don’t undermine. If you see a peer creating community, support it or create your own space without shadowing theirs.

• Remember: coaches need coaching too. How you handle yourself in public forums is a mirror of your own practice.

𝗧𝗵𝗲 𝗢𝗻𝗲𝗻𝗲𝘀𝘀 𝗣𝗲𝗿𝘀𝗽𝗲𝗰𝘁𝗶𝘃𝗲

At Oneness, we believe business growth and human growth are not separate journeys. The way we engage in community, handle competition, and uphold integrity is the work. Coaching is not just a service; it’s a relationship-based profession. Your business success will be built on the trust you earn, not just the tactics you deploy.

Let’s close the gap, not just in business skills, but in how we hold space for each other as we grow.

Reflection Question:

The next time you see a peer share a struggle, what will your first response be? A promotion, a pivot or a moment of true connection.